Monday, January 4, 2010

Anonymous

---
I was reluctant at first to call the 423 Men phone number as I told myself I was fine with my dabbling in pornography and could figure this out on my own. Well after many years of constantly fighting the same battle and repeatedly telling myself I’d never do it again....I always fell back into the same rut. It was finally time to get healing and restoration in my life.

In just over 2 months I have seen immense growth in my life and in the lives of my fellow brothers in 423 Men. When we lay down our pride and allow God to step into our lives and fill the void amazing restoration happens. I have found that we as men and women have the choice to reject passivity regarding sexual bondage that consumes our lives and instead take the first step towards healing and admitting there is a problem. I cannot describe the freedom that is felt when real accountability is established with fellow brothers and when our secrets are no longer able to keep us sick. God designed us to be relational with one another and that comes down to rejecting the idea that, “I am the only one that struggles with this.” It’s a huge fat lie from the devil!

I can attest to the freedom that is felt during a recent conversation with my father. During our discussion groups at 423 Men I have realized I have wounds that I have yet to deal with in my life that have caused me to deal with the pain in negative ways. One of these wounds was the relationship with my father. I had always felt we lacked a deep connection that went further than just sports, work and recreation. I had been praying about an opportunity to talk with him and apologize for the wrong I had brought to our relationship and the commitment I wanted to make to righting our relationship to a healthy one where deep intimacy was created.

Recently I was driving with him and knew this was the time God had provided. However, I just wanted to keep my mouth shut and continue listening to the lie I'd been living with. I started out with a stutter as I was nervous and didn’t know exactly how to phrase my thoughts. Well after I got out the first initial words, things started to come out smoother and more coherent. What continued was an open and honest conversation about how I wanted to fix our relationship to be more than just sports, work and recreation. My father echoed those same feelings and admitted he had areas to work on too. I then shared about my struggle with pornography and how I had sought out help via a group through my church. My open and honest words opened the gate for my dad to freely share and what resulted was a powerful hour long conversation about our daily struggles of living in purity.

It is amazing what God does when we stop listening to the lies of the devil and seek real, open and honest communication with the ones we love. When we become real with the people around us, that's where we find the strength, courage and growth we all need to live a life of Godly purity. 423 Men isn’t about making men feel guilty or shameful about their past, but equipping them with the tools and surrounding them with men to bring growth and restoration into our lives. I look forward to my continual involvement and participation in my 423 Men group.

Anonymous

No comments:

Post a Comment